After working in the sex toy industry for several years, there are not too many toys that I see which are ground-breaking or completely unique, despite what their marketing might tell you. Thankfully we live in a time when pure silicone is becoming more affordable and common in sex toy production and a variety of motors have been refined to be powerful and rechargeable. What makes me excited is when I find a toy that hits a lot of my basic requirements and does so in an easy-to-access way: Enter the Aphrodite by Exotica Erotica, a new favorite on my nightstand.
Where I live, summertime means hurricane season. I have a to-go bag packed and have made evacuation plans with my friends and therapist. New Orleans is a subtropical city and as such we get blustery thunderstorms that knock out power fairly often, maybe every few weeks. Although I love my rechargeable and plug-in vibrators, I decided that this summer I would go back to exploring battery operated vibes that I could easily travel with in my to-go bag or use during a thunderstorm black-out. I am pleased to say that the iroha zen vibe makes the cut!
The first time I cried during orgasm was with a casual fling I had in the wake of a horrible breakup from a super toxic relationship. In hindsight, maybe I shouldn’t have been having sex with anyone, but I was desperate to hold on to any sort of normalcy, even if it meant acting like the breakup was something I could just easily get over by fucking a casual acquaintance. The rush of the emotion when I came was overwhelming and I couldn’t stop the tears. I was incredibly embarrassed and tried to hide the reaction by squeezing my eyes shut and burying my face in a pillow, attempting to make noises to distract from the crying.
I tend to lust after the sex toys that are non-representational sculpted works of art. Don’t get me wrong, I have many penis-shaped dildos that I love using. There is just something about a smoothed curve of an object that could be left out as an art piece on the coffee table that makes me want to… These objects are seductive, inviting you to pick them up and caress them, use them to caress yourself with them. The Fling by NobEssence is one of these sculptures.
I have always struggled with my period. I have a short cycle, a long bleed-time, and a heavy flow. I often get debilitating cramps that make it difficult to stand up. I’ve never worn a light-colored item of clothing while on my period that hasn’t gotten blood on it. Inconvenient and annoying are the first words that pop into my mind when I think about my period. The Fun Cup by Fun Factory hasn’t made my period more fun, but it has made it a little less inconvenient.
This actually deserves several volumes. A whole library, even. Sex is this idea that permeates so many aspects of our life: The pursuit of it colors many interactions between people. The idea of it makes people excited or angry. There are laws about who gets to have it and how, and even laws about how to talk about it and to whom. But when the topic gets brought up, so few of us are on the same page about what we are even talking about.
I recently attended my metamour’s* birthday party, which was a sex party thrown and hosted by our mutual person. Leading up to the event I had many thoughts surrounding my invitation to the party: Do I want to go? Does my metamour want me there? Does my sweetie want me there? How comfortable are we all going to be in this situation? Will I know other people in attendance? Is it going to be weird if I see my sweetie and her partner having sex? Do I trust everyone to act respectfully?
I am a big believer that there is something out there for everyone. Sometimes it just takes a while to find it; but you better believe that it is out there AND there is an ethical way to obtain it. From vanilla sweetness to the raunchiest kink there are porn actors who like what they perform and are compensated fairly for their work. Of course there are some companies that try to scam their actors and push them to do more for less money, but that, unfortunately, is pretty commonplace in capitalism regardless of the field of labor. Sex Work is Work and we should all be fighting for better labor practices across the board.
But I digress. Porn is an exhibitionist and sexually explicit form of art. Some porn can be totally hot as well as educational, not necessarily in the “how to do this” type model (of which there IS some excellent porn out there of this kind) but in the sense that some porn crosses genres in an easy and elegant fashion that makes the introduction to new ways of sexy more accessible. CrashPad’s Episode 253: Sinful Sweetheart and Tramp is one of these gems.
You finally picked up that vibrator you’ve been eyeing and those anal beads you’ve been curious about. You had a wild and ruckus night and this morning, in the cold light of day, you look over and see the lube and cum-encrusted toys on your bed stand and wonder “What is the best way to clean my sex toys?” Like most things, there is not just one answer to that question. In this post I have broken down cleaning instructions by material of the toy and if there is a motor or not. This post will be part of a larger series all about the maintenance of sex toys and BDSM gear. Your sex toys are an investment and your health & well being are connected to the care of your toys. A well made toy should last you for years– maybe even decades if the material is top-notch and you know how to properly care for it.
When I first heard rumblings of a new sex toy, the Queen Bee, being released by Hot Octopuss, the company that brought us a fairly innovative luxury vibrating penis stroker, I was pretty excited. This new toy was aimed at clits and promised to bring their award winning oscillations to the table. Unfortunately, you need to do more than aim something in the general direction of a clit to get a promising reaction.